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Having a successful marriage has always been something that’s really important to me, so recently I’ve found myself looking up the best marriage books that I should pick up and read. No, I’m not married or engaged, but Scott and I do plan on getting married, and I want to make sure we both do everything we can to start our marriage off right and keep it going strong!
Whether you’re currently married and want to improve upon your current situation, are in a relationship and want to set your marriage up for success, or even if you’re single and want to know how to start your relationship off on the right foot, these books apply to you!
Don’t let the “marriage” part scare you off. Building a solid relationship from the start is never a bad thing, and these books definitely can help with that.
Pointing out the obvious here, but a good reminder – reading the books is the easy part. The hard part comes after that, when you actually need to implement what you learned and put in the work. But if you and your significant other are willing to make that effort, then reading these books will definitely be worthwhile.
The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts
By: Gary Chapman, PhD
Rated 4.8 stars out of 14,428 reviews.
This is a book I currently already own and really enjoyed. Although I haven’t read all the books listed below, I think this one easily could be the absolute best marriage book on the list.
It’s all about how every one has their own love language, and you need to “speak” that language in order for them to feel loved. Not showing them love in their love language can leave them feeling unhappy and unsatisfied in the relationship.
Learning to speak their love language isn’t too difficult, its just working on developing a habit you maybe didn’t put effort into having before.
It’s a really quick and easy read. Very easy to understand and start implementing right away!
Click here for plenty of ideas on all of the different Love Languages!
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
By: John Gottman, PhD and Nan Silver
Rated 4.7 stars out of 641 reviews.
Another classic in the marriage book genre, with good reason! This book breaks down the 7 principles needed to steer you towards the most successful marriage possible. It discusses how to communicate effectively through any issues, no matter the topic.
Packed full of exercises you can complete together, this book will absolutely help to improve your marriage or relationship, bringing you much closer together.
201 Relationship Questions: The Couple’s Guide to Building Trust and Emotional Intimacy
By: Barrie Davenport
Rated 4.4 stars out of 92 reviews.
This is a book specifically designed to be worked through together. Filled with important questions to ask each other to get to know one another better, build trust, become better listeners, support each other, and overall grow closer. It also will help you figure yourself out better, and what you need out of your marriage or relationship.
From some more lighthearted, to heavier questions, this book will leave you with the answers to how to set the two of you up for a happy and successful marriage.
Choosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start with We>Me
By: Debra Fileta, LPC
Rated 4.9 stars out of 125 reviews.
This book outlines and explains the 8 choices involved in marriage that shift it from a hard one to a great and successful one. She shares the results of thousands of surveys she’s taken from couples on everything from communication, intimacy, working through issues, and everything in between.
This one does have a faith component, so be mindful of that if that is something you’re looking for, or not really into.
The 4 Habits of Joy-Filled Marriages: How 15 Minutes a Day Will Help You Stay in Love
By: Marcus Warner and Chris Coursey
Rated 4.6 stars out of 16 reviews.
This book focuses on the idea of joy, and more importantly the “joy gap”, meaning the amount of time happening between moments of joy you share with your partner. The bigger the gap, the more you feel alone in your relationship, and the unhappier you feel. When the gap is smaller, you feel connected, happy, like a team, and your relationship is a source of joy for the both of you.
Throughout the book you’ll find exercises to complete together that essentially rewire your brain to default to joy. You’ll learn how to have a stronger bond, increase the joy within the relationship, shorten the “joy gap” and ultimately have a successful and happy relationship.
No More Fighting: The Relationship Book for Couples: 20 Minutes a Week to a Stronger Relationship
By: Alicia Muñoz, LPC
Rated 4.9 stars out of 25 reviews.
Essentially this book is going to guide you through all of your fights and disagreements you have in your relationship or marriage, breaking down the root of them. You’ll learn how to properly communicate your issues, as well as how to really listen to your partner.
Filled with relationship challenges, exercises, and guidance, this book will leave you with the tools you need to resolve your issues and truly understand each other.
Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last
By: John Gottman, PhD
Rated 4.6 stars out of 129 reviews
This book is filled with tests to help you and your partner figure out what time of marriage or relationship you have. What are your strengths and weaknesses as a couple, and what steps you can take to build a strong relationship.
You’ll learn how to recognize unhealthy behavior that can ultimately lead to a failed marriage, and provide you tips and advice on how to kick those bad habits.
Related: 10 Bad Relationship Habits You Need To Break
Mindful Relationship Habits: 25 Practices for Couples to Enhance Intimacy, Nurture Closeness, and Grow a Deeper Connection
By: S.J. Scott and Barrie Davenport
Rated 4.7 stars out of 48 reviews.
Sometimes your relationship can become much lower on the priority list, and life get in the way. The sweet things you or your partner used to do, maybe are happening less frequently or not at all anymore. Conversations often escalate to arguments. Your partner’s needs have become less important.
This book outlines 25 “Mindful Relationship Habits” to start incorporating in your relationship with the intent of how to better communicate, be present, understand each other’s needs, and diffuse arguments. You’ll learn how to be more intentional about how to interact with your significant other, which can make all the difference.
Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married
By: Gary Chapman, PhD
Rated 4.6 stars out of 859 reviews.
This book focuses on how often marriages aren’t as successful as they could be due to couples lack of knowledge on how to work together as teammates in the relationship.
It is packed full of tips and advice to help the two of you develop a strong, supportive, and happy marriage or relationship. Focusing on how to build a solid foundation, working through disagreements without escalating to fights, talking through important issues that may come up in the relationship, how to apologize and forgive each other, and more!
I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships
By: Michael S. Sorensen
Rated 4.7 stars out of 176 reviews.
Although this isn’t specifically a marriage or relationship book, it’s still a very valuable read. It’s all about mastering an important communication skill – validation.
Learning this skill will help you learn how to calm insecurities and fears in others, have your partner feel more heard and appreciated, quickly resolve disagreements, have others be more open to hearing your point of view, give effective feedback that is heard, and more.
I plan on working my way through this list one by one, because I truly think there is something unique to learn in each of them!
Whether you want to strengthen your bond, improve intimacy, work on communication, have less arguments, or whatever it may be, these books will be valuable to you and your partner!
I hope this list of the best marriage books will be helpful in your relationship, no matter what the stage of it is!
Did I miss any books that you found helpful in your marriage or relationship? I’d love if you commented below what they are so they can be added to the list!
I love this list! You really did your homework. I am a relationshsip coach and you hit on some of the best books out there. I will be checking back to rad more!!Love your blog!!
Thank you so much, Carla!! I really appreciate your comment 🙂 If you have any other recommendations, please let me know!